Five weeks into the 2026 Heavyweights season and the record book needs a new tab, because two men are unbeaten and only one of them deserves it.
Start with Ryan Weaver, 5-0, an all-play mark of 47-8 that would make most of this league's actual champions blush. Longtime readers of the archive know Weaver's career ledger is not exactly gilded — a single ring, a points-chump finish, a worst-record season sitting right there next to it. This is a man who has lived in the Heavyweights basement before. Right now he is playing like he intends to burn the deed to it. Christian Watson's 32.3 and Parker Washington's 30.4 did the heavy lifting in Weaver's win over Elliott Simmonds, and Elliott's own Drake Maye put up 47.46 points and still lost the week. Write that sentence down. History will remember it even if Elliott would rather forget it.
Then there is Trent Harley, also 5-0, also unbeaten, and also sitting on an all-play record of 31-24 with a luck delta that says the schedule has been kinder to him than the scoreboard alone would suggest. Harley's entire career regular-season line, rookie season included, reads 7-7 — a reminder that unbeaten and inevitable are not the same word. Joe Burrow dropped 32.6 on John Penney's Chase Greatness this week and Harley cashed it, which is the correct way to use Joe Burrow, but the archive will note the difference between Weaver's domination and Harley's good fortune even if ParmBijan Cheese doesn't care to.
The number of the week, though, belongs to a man who knows exactly what a big number earns you and what it doesn't. Nick Inman put up 165.28 — Puka Nacua for 37.7, Bucky Irving for 31.5, Jordan Love tacking on 29.28 — and buried Justin Waitt's Diamond Dogs by nearly fifty points despite Josh Allen throwing for 33.5 on the other side. Longtime readers know what Inman's name means on this page: a runner-up finish on the ledger, a division title and a scoring crown sitting in the archive beside it, and still no championship. This was just a blowout in October. But a man who has stood in a championship game ought to be taken seriously when he starts dropping 165s this early, and the record book should be paying attention.
As for Ben Cunnion, three-time champion, he is quietly doing three-time-champion things. He beat Ollie Simmonds 130.90 to 122.14 behind Aaron Rodgers and James Cook, and in doing so denied Ollie a signature win that an 0-5 start desperately needed. This was no blowout — Ollie put up a perfectly respectable 122 and still found a way to lose it, which is closer to the shape of his career than anything else this week: a runner-up finish on the resume, no championship next to it, and now a five-game losing streak. The archive does not forget these things. It writes them down and waits.
Brian Jones beat Ryan El Masri comfortably behind a 33-point Matthew Stafford game, the sort of week that moves a man with three runner-up finishes and a ring already in the archive a little further from this year's basement, where Ollie Simmonds sits alone at 0-5. El Masri, meanwhile, slides to 1-4. And Evan Sinn, owner of two championships and a reputation this column has defended for thirteen seasons, dropped 154.16 — Jahmyr Gibbs for 37.7, Jaylen Warren for 36.8 — on Kevin Jones and still sits at 2-3, undone by a negative luck delta that has apparently decided Sinn's talent and Sinn's record don't need to agree with each other this year.
Nobody in this league is having a stranger season than Ollie Simmonds, whose 12-43 all-play record and league-low 459.06 points for tell a much grimmer story than this week's respectable number suggests. He now shares the archive's second-most worst-record finishes with a crowd of company, still trailing Nick Inman's three. Somewhere in that same archive there ought to be a category for a man who loses competitive games and lopsided ones with equal regularity. If there isn't, there will be by the time this one's finished.